I used to wonder why and how my friends, co-workers and family members were getting divorced. What intrigued me more was the acrimonious manner in which the cases were ending up. Nonetheless, I didn’t need to wait for long before I got the answers. Two years ago when my seven-year marriage came to an abrupt end. I have yet to recover from the split – I am still carrying a lot of baggage with me.
When I first met ex-wife, Triza some ten years ago, I never thought we would end up as an item, let alone have two lovely kids together. She had just joined the company I worked for. I found her a bit snobbish and her short cropped hair didn’t make things any better. I preferred women with long hair. Then one day she took the bullet for me and told me that she covered for me because she only felt sorry for me. That’s when I got interested. To cut the long story short, we ended up marrying each other.
All was well until one day she didn’t turn up from work. By then we were not working in the same firm. Upon inquiry, she said she needed a break from me. I’ve never been shocked like that in my life. I let have her moment, but she did not come back. She was getting married to our next door neighbor who was several years younger than her. She needed a divorce, she told me.
My divorce lawyer was from hell, simply because I didn’t want to let go. Apparently, my life had come to a halt as I spent a lot of dollars chasing non-issues, not to mention the frustrating court system. What’s more, I hated my ex-lawyer with passion, which drained me emotionally. My divorce lawyer was awful, he only created conflict rather than resolve.
Then I met one of the divorce lawyers in Modesto Ca from heaven. She had been recommended to me by a friend who understood my case because he had trodden the same dreadful path. She has been handling separation and divorce cases for the last 20 years and has an excellent reputation among the legal community. My divorce lawyer listened a lot and soon recommended me to a divorce counselor. This worked out great. But the best part is that she took charge of the whole process.
Things started moving. She not only had my interest at heart but also moved with speed to protect our children and my property. Within a short time, she had identified my areas of need and those of my wife. Soon even my ex’s lawyer was towing to her line and we were all having amicable discussions. Just like that the divorce proceeding and discussion became, sober, mature and friendly. I even had a coffee date with my ex, which I learnt later, was fixed by my lawyer. Eventually, we did achieve a comprehensive agreement and settlement. True, I lost the custody of my kids but got the visitation rights. I know exactly why I lost both the war and the battle, initially; I was too emotionally involved to even think straight. Today I’m wiser, thanks to my wonderful lawyer.